F    Bb


F                                                C   Gm
Oh I just love the kind of woman who can walk over a man
              Bb      F        Gm
I mean like a goddamn marching band
                 Eb         Bb           Dm      Gm
She says, "Like, literally" music is the air she breathes
                  C              Gm      Dm
And the malaprops make me wanna fucking scream
                  C              Gm      Dm
I wonder if she even knows what that word means
          A            Dm
Well it's literally not that

F            Bb
Oooh, ooooh
                  F                               Bb    Dm       Gm
Of the few main things I hate about her one's her petty vogue ideals
               Am            Gm             Bb           Gm
Someone's been told too many times they're beyond their years
          Eb              Bb         F      Gm
By every half-wit of distinction she keeps around 
        C                   Dm
And now every insufferable convo
              C                       Dm
Features her patiently explaining the cosmos
Bb        Dm
Of which she is in the middle

Bb     Dm                      Gm
Oh my god, I swear this never happens
Bb      Dm                           Gm
Lately I can't stop the wheels from spinning
Bb F      Gm
I feel so unconvincing
        Bb    F         Gm      C
When I fumble with your buttons

F
Oooh

F    Bb        F                                  Bb     F       Gm
She blames her excess on my influence but gladly hoovers all my drugs
                            Bb         F      Gm
I found her naked with her best friend in the tub
         Eb               Bb                     Gm
We sang silent night in three parts, which was fun
                              C                Dm
Til she said that she sounds just like Sarah Vaughn
                           C            Gm      Dm          
I hate that soulful affectation white girls put on
              A           Dm
Why don't you move to the delta

     Bb         Gm           Dm     A        Bb
I obliged later on when you begged me to choke you