If you think there's something wrong Holes appearing on your lawn Don't you blame the man next door It's not him Flowers walk from place to place Dark spot moves around your face Objects vanish without trace It's not you I'm the mole from the Ministry And you'll all bow down to me I'm the mole in your potting shed I'm the bad thoughts inside your head And you won't catch me (Fish and visitors smell after three days) If you thinks there's something strange Garden starts to rearrange From perfect lawn to mountain range It's not you I'm the mole from the Ministry Working underground And you'll all bow down to me Moving facts and figures all around I'm the mole in your potting shed Undermine your world I'm the bad thoughts inside your head And you shouldn't think me, No! And you shouldn't think me Mole Mole Mole