[Primeira Parte]

    Am                   G                      D
The girl in the pastry shop with the net in her hair
               F                Am                  G
Is making a cannoli for you to take on your hiking trip
                       D                           F
In the woods with your bros that you've known since second grade
       Am                     G                 D
And you may encounter dragons or ruffians and be called upon
     F                 Am
To employ your testosterone
                    G                D          F
In a battle for supremacy and access to females glued to the TV
Am                      G           D                      F
 And even if you are victorious you may receive many cuts, bruises, and scrapes
            Am                    G
And you will require band aids and antiseptic ointments
    D                           F                Am
And tender loving kisses on your stab wounds and when you come home
        G                D              F            Am
She will be there waiting for you with a fire in her eyes
                 G                     D
And a big fat cannoli to shove in your mouth
           F
And that's why you

[Refrão]

      Am G    D    F
Thank God for girls
      Am        G
Holla Jesu Christe
           D       F
From Tennessee to LA
      Am G    D    F
Thank God for girls
        Am        G
On your reckoning day 
           D            F
You better bow down and pray
         Am   G
She's so big
          D   F
She's so strong
        Am   G            D          F
She's so energetic in her sweaty overalls
      Am G    D    F
Thank God for girls
              Am      G
Thank God for girls
              D      F
Thank God for girls

[Segunda Parte]

Am                   G               D                     F
 I'm so glad I got a girl to think of even though she isn't mine
Am                         G                         D                          F
 I think about her all the day and all the night it's enough to know that she's a-live
        Am                       G
She says I give her sweaty palms she almost had a heart attack
D                              F
 The truth is that I'm just as scared I don't know how to act
Am                          G
 I wish that I could get to know her better
            D                               F
But meeting up in real life would cause the illusion to shatter
Am                      G
 I carved her name into all the trees
D                 F
 Sang a song down on one knee
Am                   G                      D                 F
 Looking at the underwear page of the Sears catalog like when I was 14
Am                     G                 D          F
 I'm levitating like a magnet turned the wrong way around
            Am                  G                    D                          F
I'm like an Indian Fakir tryna' meditate on a bed of nails with my pants pulled down

[Refrão]

      Am G    D    F
Thank God for girls
      Am        G
Holla Jesu Christe
           D       F
From Tennessee to LA
      Am G    D    F
Thank God for girls
        Am        G
On your reckoning day 
           D            F
You better bow down and pray
         Am   G
She's so big
          D   F
She's so strong
        Am   G            D          F
She's so energetic in her sweaty overalls
      Am G    D    F
Thank God for girls
              Am      G
Thank God for girls
              D      F
Thank God for girls

[Terceira Parte]

Am                   G    D                 F            Am
God took a rib from Adam, ground it up in a centrifuge machine
                   G               D                    F
Mixed it with cardamom and cloves, microwaved it on the popcorn setting
      Am                 G               D
While Adam was like "WOO-HOO that really hurts"
            F             Am            G
Going off into the tundra, so pissed at God
        D                            F                      Am
And he started lighting minor forest fires, stealing osprey eggs
                 G                            D
Messing with the bees who were trying to pollinate the echinacea
F              Am                     G
 Until God said, "Imma smite you with loneliness
    D                   F
And break your heart in two"
     Am            G       D               F     Am             G
 And Adam wept and wailed, tearing out his hair, falling on his knees
               D       F
 Looked to the sky and said

 "Thank God"