We're the Beta Band and we're nice and clean We're always polite and hardly ever mean Times have changed, we used to be smelly, We lived in a squat 'til a punk nicked our telly Since we've been signed we eat real good We always wash our hands and chew our food Quashis rotis are our favourite dish Served spicy with chicken or fish In the world of fashion there's two shining lights Nancy and Caroline they helped us alright And Gordon Anderson played a big part Just when the Beta Band was about to start It all started in London town, when we gave our demo to Phil Brown Then we met Miles at Parlophone and let him hear Dogs Got A Bone He said "go to Falkner and put it on wax" So the next week was spent cutting four tracks Now a manager was needed to make us complete Miles knew a Wiganer we should meet His name was Dave with the broken specs A quiet manner and nuff respec We met at Nanchos and cleaned the plate A meal like that we'd never ate Then we met Brian and the Microdot crew Martin, Matt and John Platt too Adrenalin Village was the place to be We had no money so they got us in free The first thing Dave did as boss Was make us play Water Rats in Kings Cross We played five songs got credit for four Went down well so we decided to tour Next up was Henry and Nich Making the show go without a hitch Up and down the country *from* side to side Wi big yin driving it's a bumpy ride Miles gave us an album deal We said "yes" and went for a meal Drinking champagne at EMI The irony almost made us cry this one's for Scotland We went to Wales and fannyed around Ended up with the Patty Patty Sound With open minds we went to achieve Chris Allison caught it all on Neive He hummed and hawed and became a pest Twittering on about the old Neive desk We had to call in Keith and Miles When Chris' hair got caught in the dials We started to get known on Radio One When Jo Whiley got a fax from my mum Mary Ann Hobbs invited us to play At Maida Vale we spent a day With Chris Allison's hair cut free It was time for Cornwall and the third EP With a glock and a sax and a mighty gong All we needed was a hit pop song We thought this time we were on a good start But they made a new rule that banned us from the chart The songs were good so we didn't give a toss And we called it Los Amigos Del Beta Bandidos