[Corny] And now, live, from the certified up-to-code baltimore eventorium For the first time ever on nationwide television It's the Corny Collins spectacular [Council girls] He's Corny! [Corny] Brought to you by ultra clutch hairspray! [Corny (& ensemble)] What gives a girl Power and punch? Is it charm, is it poise? No, it's hairspray! What gets a gal Asked out to lunch Is it brains, is it dough? No, it's hairspray! If you take a ride With no can at your side Then your flip will be gone With the wind But if you spray it and lock it You can take off in a rocket And in outer space Each hair will be in place Why take a chance When you get up and dance If you twist, I insist You use hairspray And tell your mother Her head she should smother With ultra-clutch faithfully So if you're a redhead A blonde or brunette Just take my advice And you might just get The only thing better than hairspray [Corny] That's me! [Ensemble] Ska-doo-dle-e-ya Doo-dle-e-ya do wah [Corny] Forget the milkman The only thing better than hairspray [Ensemble] Hairspray! Wow! [Corny] That's me! [Corny & ensemble] What makes a man Reach out and touch? Ultra clutch! [Corny & ensemble] So if you're a redhead A blonde or brunette Just take my advice And you might just get [Corny] The only thing better than hairspray That's me! [Ensemble] Ska-doo-dle-e-ya Doo-dle-e-ya do wah [Council girls] He's corny collins! [Corny] The only thing better than hairspray [Ensemble] Hairspray! Wow! [Corny] That's me! [Ensemble] Ska-doo-dle-e-ya do wah Ska-doo-dle-e-ya do wah! Do wow! [Corny] Hey, baby, you look like you could use a stiff one! [Brenda] Ska-doo-dle-e-ya-do do wah!